The Birth of My LeMons Race Truck

"Raymundo" (raymundo)
12/09/2015 at 15:55 • Filed to: None

It was 4 pm on a Friday afternoon. I’m getting ready to leave work and decide to thumb through my local Facebook FS/FT group. “$300, need gone today, 1984 Mazda B2000. DOES NOT RUN.” I quickly ring up my good friend !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! whom I end up doing just about every car adventure with and say “You wanna go try to play Roadkill tonight?” Of course he’s interested so I drive over to his house, cash in hand.

By this point the sun is setting and we still have a hour and a half drive to get to the seller’s house. When we arrive at around 9:30 pm, we decide to strategically park so that we can make a quick get away. The neighborhood and general atmosphere didn’t exactly shout “you’re safe here.” Upon meeting the seller, who turned out to be a great joy to be around, truly needed the truck gone today as he was moving in the morning. We had a Volvo 240, a box full of tools, and no trailer. We’re driving this truck home tonight.

Pop the hood and BUHOHMYGOD IS THIS REAL? Thank god there was no battery because the amount of immediately visible electrical shorts was breath taking. We later discovered the battery was dead and removed because the coil was hooked up in the most janky way that constantly drew power. Scary. As it turns out, the always-on coil melted the igniter.

I kid you not when I say we found a replacement igniter in the trash can next to the truck. I also came prepared with a new coil among other possibly required replacement components, just in case. Eventually we un-fucked the gaggle of wires and BWAHROOM!!!!! The open header 2.2L engine woke the neighbors at 10:30 pm. Victory! Almost. Lets fill the radiator with a garden hose and drive it around the block.

Why doesn’t the clutch engage? *Removes cap for clutch master cylinder reservoir.* It’s bone dry. No big deal, lets fill it with a bottle of questionable brake fluid that’s in the bed of the truck, with all the tetanus-giving rusty things, and bleed the system. We try to bleed the system for about an hour when we finally realize the seals are not sealing . We can’t build any pressure to complete the job. It’s mid-night.

How do we get this truck home? It’s only leaks fuel from the fuel feed hose to the carburetor and still has a lot of janky wiring. Oh, and you have to hit things to make the exterior lights work, but it’s so close to being road worthy; we just need a functioning clutch. As it turns out, we couldn’t fabricate a hand-actuated clutch with rope and the available electric solenoid (the guy wanted to make a low-rider mini truck) actuated in the wrong direction for our application, so what do we do?

1am

We’re were in a hunger and exhaustion induced stupor when we decided to dissemble the master cylinder and try to use a pack of various O-rings to create a seal. Upon disassembly, it appeared that the rust in the cylinder just grabbed the rubber seal and moved it off the piston. WE CAN FIX THIS. 30 minutes later with a screwdriver and PB blaster, I manage to fix the master and slave cylinders. We bled the system and HOLY SHIT WE’RE DRIVING THIS JUNK. WE’RE ACTUALLY DRIVING THIS JUNK

It’s about 3am at this point (sorry for the loud test drive, neighbors) and we still had to drive back into town to get a battery for the truck and also get a gallon of gas to get it to a gas station. By 4am we had done it. We were hauling ass back home in a 1984 Mazda B2000 that hadn’t ran in who knows how long, had shoddy brakes, a poor alignment, was leaking fuel in the engine bay, had grossly dry rotted tires, AN OPEN HEADER, rust holes in the floor that you could walk through, and intermittent exterior lights. But I got it for $300.

About two years prior, Roflcopter and I had another journey that involved getting a 12A rotary engine for $50. A couple of months ago I managed to get a couple of free turbos from a 2JZ just for taking them off of the engine for a friend as he is upgrading to a big single turbo.

This $300 truck is going to be a LeMons race truck with a P-port twin turbo 12A. I’m excite.

Edit: I forgot to mention that I have a friend with a wrecked Miata. In exchange for helping him pull the engine and borrowing my hoist, he’s giving me the rest of the car. There is the truck’s new suspension/brakes/drive train.

DISCUSSION (100)

bob and john > Raymundo
12/09/2015 at 16:00

this is just roadkill.

TheRealBicycleBuck > Raymundo
12/09/2015 at 16:04

Wow. My first truck was an ‘83 B2000, white with a blue interior and blue pinstripes down the sides. I totalled it when a girl ran a stop sign and I t-boned her car.

I’ve thought about turning my ‘94 B3000 into a lemons truck..... Keep posting and inspire me!

Raymundo > TheRealBicycleBuck
12/09/2015 at 16:06

Do it! We’re going to start tearing into this next month and hopefully it’ll get you motivated enough to put another B2000 on grid!

XJDano > Raymundo
12/09/2015 at 16:07

Ho Lee Shit

Raymundo > XJDano
12/09/2015 at 16:13

I forgot to mention the part where I scored a free Miata chassis for helping a friend pull the engine out of his wrecked Miata. There’s the suspension/brakes/drive train for the truck.

PatBateman > Raymundo
12/09/2015 at 16:21

Careful with those fuel leaks. Shit happens.

Exhibit A: my (now former) truck.

Kinja'd!!!

vondon302 > Raymundo
12/09/2015 at 16:28

Awesome. Give us updates on your progress.

uofime-2 > Raymundo
12/09/2015 at 16:33

That thing is going to be such a shit box and I mean that in the best way possible!

Raymundo > PatBateman
12/09/2015 at 16:37

Oh yeah, the hose was replaced once I got the truck home. Fuel leaks are no bueno.

Raymundo > vondon302
12/09/2015 at 16:38

Okie dokie, will do.

Raymundo > uofime-2
12/09/2015 at 16:39

Absolutely! :D

MontegoMan562 is a Capri RS Owner > Raymundo
12/09/2015 at 16:52

Things I don’t normally like. Mazda pick ups, Rotary engines, turbos, miatas.

But holy shit I’m excited about this build. This is looking to be the coolest winter build of oppo.

Daily Drives a Dragon - One Last Lap > Raymundo
12/09/2015 at 18:34

Where and when was this?

Raymundo > Daily Drives a Dragon - One Last Lap
12/09/2015 at 23:11

I bought the truck earlier this summer from a guy in Alabama. I’m in Florida.

Daily Drives a Dragon - One Last Lap > Raymundo
12/09/2015 at 23:32

That’s what I thought given that it has 3 Alabama plates in the door.

Raymundo > Daily Drives a Dragon - One Last Lap
12/09/2015 at 23:34

An astute observation. :D

Stef Schrader > Raymundo
12/10/2015 at 17:33

Welcome to the madness. Mwahahahaha. (YES.)

Eddie Brannan > Raymundo
12/10/2015 at 17:34

I’m sitting here just nodding my head right now. Looking forward to the rest of this. Please update often!

texFCturboII > Raymundo
12/10/2015 at 17:44

“This $300 truck is going to be a LeMons race truck with a P-port twin turbo 12A. I’m excite.”

This made my insides happy in ways that only Thanksgiving Dinner can do.

Kyle Critchnau > Raymundo
12/10/2015 at 17:49

Because Roadkill.

Tyler > Raymundo
12/10/2015 at 17:51

Love it! Keep us posted!

James May is my spirit animal > Raymundo
12/10/2015 at 17:54

Kinja'd!!!

VOLVO! <3

( I know I contribute absolutely nothing to any post I comment in )

James May is my spirit animal > Raymundo
12/10/2015 at 17:55

Kinja'd!!!

Is this like the one that Roadkill had a few weeks ago?

aquila121 > Raymundo
12/10/2015 at 17:56

This thing you’re doing, don’t quit now. I love it, and eagerly await your triumph of Frankensteining.

signinsrlame > Raymundo
12/10/2015 at 17:59

I’m not going to say this is the greatest story EVER told, but it’s pretty feckin awesomesauce

j1mbo > Raymundo
12/10/2015 at 18:02

I guess this will be one of the few Lemons cars that’s entirely made of just one automaker brand. It’s amazing you guys are still under the $500 budget. You could probably do a $50 Rustoleum paint and have an almost decent looking truck. LOL
Totally awesome build!

Sampsonite24-Earth's Least Likeliest Hero > Raymundo
12/10/2015 at 18:10

I can not wait to read more lol

Gene > Raymundo
12/10/2015 at 18:15

Kinja'd!!!

Graduate from the school of Pewe.

Gene > Raymundo
12/10/2015 at 18:17

More proof that the answer will always be "Pick-up". (Now with Miata DNA!)

shop-teacher > MontegoMan562 is a Capri RS Owner
12/10/2015 at 18:20

Right there with you!

shop-teacher > Raymundo
12/10/2015 at 18:22

There is an insane amount of win in this story! I can’t wait to hear more!

The Don > bob and john
12/10/2015 at 18:26

This is just the most awesome idea I’ve heard.

Future next gen S2000 owner > Raymundo
12/10/2015 at 18:29

if you can get it properly sorted, I’ll be this thing will be a blast to drive.

Chase D. Morrison > Raymundo
12/10/2015 at 18:32

Holy Hell!

Kinja'd!!!

Professor-Lavahot > Raymundo
12/10/2015 at 18:40

Kinja'd!!!

I would purchase this fascia configuration if it were a factory option.

imprezanoturbo > Raymundo
12/10/2015 at 18:44

I am awed by your roadkill know-how. Thought of any good names for Lemons?

dieselectric > Raymundo
12/10/2015 at 18:59

Kinja'd!!!

This door panel is the best use of old plates. The sheer number of haphazard, rigged solutions on this truck is admirable/scary in equal degrees.

leicester > Raymundo
12/10/2015 at 19:07

Your narrative so far sounds like a typical LeMons race report. I’d say you’re all set!

ronmler3 > Raymundo
12/10/2015 at 19:08

You wasted a lot of time - you don’t need a clutch - ESPECIALLY if there are not a lot of intersections on your way.....

BimmerMedic > Raymundo
12/10/2015 at 19:11

Makes me miss my old $150.00 ‘81 F-100. Aka “the mule” (it was even fake gold spray painted on the doors). Wipers: connect the 2 bare wires under the dash, horn: touch the seat belt male end to those 2 terminals on the steering wheel, turn signals: slap the dash really hard. Just ignore the gaping hole in the floorboard where they cut in the floor shifter. Used more oil than gas, had to park it downhill on the levee to keep the oil in it and had a battery disconnect. That straight 6 ran great until the day it overheated. Damn, I miss that truck

PNO TECH > Raymundo
12/10/2015 at 19:16

The spirit of ‘Just DO this!’

Following you, sir: keep us in the loop

ronmler3 > Raymundo
12/10/2015 at 19:17

Why is the ass end so far down in the first picture, but it’s OK in the gas station?

Which picture is earlier, and what happened?

CrownVictorious > Raymundo
12/10/2015 at 19:18

This idea is so bad it’s awesome.

WhiskeyGolf > Raymundo
12/10/2015 at 19:24

Amazing! I commend your get-it-done-ivness and skills with minimal tools. Looking forward to what you build!

J. S. > Raymundo
12/10/2015 at 19:43

Clutch? The hallmark of shade tree mechanics is “don’t need no stinking clutch”.

Darkshoe (With Straight 6) > Raymundo
12/10/2015 at 19:50

I’VE WANTED TO BUILD A ROTARY POWERED RACE TRUCK FOR LEMONS ALL YEAR HRRRRNGG

Driver > Raymundo
12/10/2015 at 19:59

You should name it Synergy.

jcn-txct > Raymundo
12/10/2015 at 20:09

You and your friend have GUTS! and impressive wrenching skills in “suspect” setting. I would have bought the truck, got the hell out of dodge and trailering and wrenching it at home with my trusty internet favorites of OEM and aftermarket auto parts.

Old-Busted-Hotness > Raymundo
12/10/2015 at 20:16

This ties in nicely with the latest Roadkill episode (which also features an engine-swapped Mazda pickup).

Argentine jalop in Kosovo > Raymundo
12/10/2015 at 20:44

You are a fucking genious. Keep us posted. Please do.

northtothefuture > Raymundo
12/10/2015 at 20:54

my $300 truck just needed a master cylinder and new battery cables, but I got lucky. plus its got a 300 i6.

northtothefuture > MontegoMan562 is a Capri RS Owner
12/10/2015 at 20:55

the mazda b2600i i had for a few years was a great little truck. other than a bad ecu and some weird vaccum line fuckery on the hub locker

InfinityAero > Raymundo
12/10/2015 at 21:22

The gearhead’s version of “The Martian”. Thumbs up.

My first vehicle was a Mazda B2200. Total POS. Not worth racing, lol, but have fun.

Raymundo > Eddie Brannan
12/10/2015 at 21:25

Okie dokie! Just wrapped up a RX-7 project so the truck should be going in the garage soon for tear down! More stories and stuff to follow.

Raymundo > Old-Busted-Hotness
12/10/2015 at 21:25

Yeah, funny thing is they put a piston engine in a rotary truck. We’re putting a rotary engine in a piston truck.

Raymundo > leicester
12/10/2015 at 21:26

Woohoo!

Raymundo > Future next gen S2000 owner
12/10/2015 at 21:26

Or a nightmare. Either way, it will be memorable.

roflcopter > XJDano
12/10/2015 at 21:26

Hey man, told you I’d find a good home for that 12A you practically gave to us ;)

Raymundo > shop-teacher
12/10/2015 at 21:26

Stay tuned!

Raymundo > Sampsonite24-Earth's Least Likeliest Hero
12/10/2015 at 21:27

I can not wait to put the death wheel to this thing.

Raymundo > BimmerMedic
12/10/2015 at 21:28

Gaping holes and bare wires? Sounds like my kind of truck.

Raymundo > James May is my spirit animal
12/10/2015 at 21:29

You contribute love. Isn’t that what matters?

Raymundo > James May is my spirit animal
12/10/2015 at 21:29

Sort of, except they had a piston engine in a rotary truck. We’re putting a rotary engine in a piston truck.

Raymundo > Driver
12/10/2015 at 21:31

When I picked it up, my girlfriend said it should be named Count Olaf because the color of the truck reminded her of Lemony Snicket. Count Olaf it is.

Raymundo > jcn-txct
12/10/2015 at 21:34

Guts? I don’t know, sometimes I think it’s just stupidity. Eh, either way, we got a sweet truck.

Raymundo > ronmler3
12/10/2015 at 21:36

There was a lot of trash in the bed of the truck. Included in the trash were lowering blocks. I put the lowering blocks on the truck because why not? It looks absolutely ridiculous, so much so that I wish we could race the truck like that but it will have Miata suspension and no lowering blocks so that won’t happen.

Raymundo > imprezanoturbo
12/10/2015 at 21:37

We are Team Snap-off.

Raymundo > PNO TECH
12/10/2015 at 21:38

Okie dokie, will do!

Raymundo > Darkshoe (With Straight 6)
12/10/2015 at 21:38

DO IT!!!!!! JUST DO IT!!!!!!

Raymundo > Argentine jalop in Kosovo
12/10/2015 at 21:38

Of course, will do!

Driver > Raymundo
12/10/2015 at 21:41

Great name, just be sure to get a tetanus shot. {:O)

printerror > Raymundo
12/10/2015 at 21:51

Tell me you’re in Jacksonville and I’ll help build it.

Raymundo > printerror
12/10/2015 at 21:55

Four hours west, but you’re still welcome to help! :P

sdwarf36 > Raymundo
12/10/2015 at 22:20

So did you have it registered for the trip-or did you have the anxiety of looking in your mirror the whole way?

MotorcycleRider > Raymundo
12/10/2015 at 22:21

I’m not saying it can’t be done, but literally none of that stuff is compatible. It’ll be interesting to see how you do it, and, more importantly, how you keep it under the $500 limit.

mrbwa1 > Raymundo
12/10/2015 at 22:21

Kinja'd!!!

Twin turbo 12a you say?

Kinja'd!!!

I love me a good rotary, but with a twin turbo, you might want to add some 2 srptroke premix to the gas tank to survive Lemons.

Daryl > Raymundo
12/10/2015 at 22:26

The oddball gear head in me loves this. The best cars I've ever bought were checked out at night. Everyone says to do it in the daylight, but work schedules & opportunity don't always work that way.

Apex Assassin > Raymundo
12/10/2015 at 22:28

Brilliant!

XJDano > roflcopter
12/10/2015 at 22:32

I noticed your name up top & thought, this’ll be good, then bam! There’s my mailbox. Ohhhhh Dis Gonna be real good!!!

Tohru > Raymundo
12/10/2015 at 22:48

You’re an absolute madman.

I would like to subscribe to your newsletter.

Raymundo > Tohru
12/10/2015 at 22:55

I’m actually quite a happy man, but I’ll take that as a compliment. Subscribe away! I don’t think you’ll be disappointed with the plans in store for the build.

shop-teacher > Raymundo
12/10/2015 at 22:57

Will do!

Tohru > Raymundo
12/11/2015 at 00:37

My only request for it is fender flares made out of old tires.

Kinja'd!!!